can't sleep

so what's a girl to do? read some Bible and write some blog, i guess.

the past 3 weeks have been turmoil at work. i don't want to say a lot about work, but i think it is ok to say that i was relieved to learn that someone from my office left to take a different job. what does that mean for me? well, the office will be a bit short handed for a while, but i think things will greatly improve overall.

God was showing me the other night that a lot of the "ick"' that went on was my own fault. all indicators were that i should have taken a promotion that was offered about 2 years ago. but i didn't. i was afraid. i didn't think i could do the job. i doubted me and i didn't trust God.

so someone else was hired to do the job and i stayed in my comfortable seat. it quickly became uncomfortable. everyone in the office endured the chaos for a year and a half, and finally it is over. now, i'm not saying it is completely my fault, because the individual causing the chaos made a bunch of poor decisions for theirself. but as for God's ministry, i guess i am culpable in how things went.

it's not exactly a biblical concept, but many people i know have a life verse. it's a verse or passage that you've read and God has used it in your life, and it just becomes a special part of who you are and where you're going. my verse is deuteronomy 31:6.

"Be strong and of a good courage, fear not, nor be afraid of them: for the LORD thy God, he [it is] that doth go with thee; he will not fail thee, nor forsake thee."

God told me long ago not to be afraid of the path He would take me. in lots of circumstances, i haven't been afraid. in this case, i was. but i'm not anymore. i've learned my lesson here.

so, yeah, we'll be short handed a little bit. i'm already a little overwhelmed learning some new software. but indications are that things are already getting better.