So, Thanksgiving just passed. I'm not a fan of holidays, so my modus operandi is to make the best of whatever befalls me, as I'm banned from work and overloaded with clutter and chaos. I know, a bleak outlook, eh? It wasn't that bad. Considering the yuckiness of work lately, I was indeed looking forward to a break. I was looking forward to spending time with my sweetie, attacking some homework, and seeing little nieces and nephews who I don't often get to see.
Mission accomplished on all of the above. Actual quality time with my Sweet P was limited, since we both had homework projects looming, but I did take time to visit with all of the kids and my siblings who were in town. Unfortunately, I also had a cold, which limited my socializing. I didn't want to share the blessing with those who were yet uninfected. So I was a bit of a leper, which actually worked out ok. I taught the older kids how to use my old (circa 1983) sampling keyboard (and drive the parents and grandparents nuts). And I looked at trains and interesting odd bits with the younger set. (Can I just say that the baby nephew is a total doll?! He's beautiful.)
But among all the festivities, I felt a little blue. It appears to me that life, especially 2009, is just throwing garbage our way. I found it hard to be truly thankful as I was processing this information, but in conclusion I did find my thankfulness. Here's what happened.
In our first year of marriage, Sweet P's mother passed away. He was also very stressed with working full time, finishing his Master's degree, and adjusting to another person living in the house with him. I was adjusting to the less than full attention one gets when dating. Not a bad year, but it had it's difficulties & heartbreak. In our second year of marriage, more tumult as my sweetie left his profession of 20 years to embark on a new one, only to be slapped in the face by his new employer. After 2 months of trying his hand as this new career, he was rejected and left unemployed. Total shocker, more heartbreak. But we pick up the pieces and move on. Third year of marriage, he's still unemployed, I'm the "breadwinner" in a sense, we're both stressed out with school, the house starts falling apart, and on this lovely holiday weekend we find ourselves cleaning up a sewage mess in the basement. This isn't the quality time I was desiring, but we don't always get a choice.
Oddly enough, this is where I find my thankful heart. I'm thankful for a man who will stick around through the good times and the bad. I'm thankful that when the awfulness comes, he's there shovelling the slop with me, instead of running for the hills. There is no one in the world with whom I would rather endure wretched crap than him. And I believe that our relationship is refined and strengthened through it all. Some people have it easy-peasy. Bless them, I wish them well. Other people face the tough times and crumble. But I found a keeper. I have a good man. I found my knight in shimmering armour, and I am a better person for being with him.
I'm hoping 2010 is a little brighter, a little more heart-warming instead of heart-breaking. We could use the encouragement; we could use some good news. But if it is not, we'll be ok. We are ten thousand times better together than we were apart. Just let the sewage and scraps of our life reflect the redemption of Jesus, let the stubborn love of our relationship show His strength and not our own, let the fragments and remnants knit us closer together and hold us close to Jesus.
Oh, yes, I am blessed and I am thankful.
No comments:
Post a Comment